DEAR DEIDRE: Do I wait for my partner while he serves time in prison – even though I caught him messaging his ex? 

I know that most people would say ‘no’, but part of me thinks I should give him one more chance. He’s having a hard enough time as it is. 

He’s serving three months, and I’ve supported him through the whole process


He’s serving three months, and I’ve supported him through the whole process

For more advice from Dear Deidre

No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.

He’s serving three months for not paying council tax, and I’ve supported him through the whole process. 

He’s 48, I’m 45 and we’ve been together for two years. 

Last week I was putting away some new clothes I’d bought him – thought it might be a nice surprise for when he’s back. 

Hidden under his t-shirts was a Nokia phone, and on it were texts to his ex. 

The conversation had started when he told her about his sentence – but as they went on, they got flirtier. 

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

The last message was him promising to see her when he got out. 

Am I a fool to stand by him? 

Most read in Dear Deidre

DEIDRE SAYS: In a word, ‘yes’. You’ve supported your partner in the lead up to his time in prison, and he’s repaid you by messaging his ex. 

Don’t waste your time waiting for him. 

You need to tell him about what you’ve found and explain how hurt you feel. Explain that as he clearly doesn’t value your relationship you have decided not to put your life on hold for him. 

Let him know you’ll spend time with family and friends with your eyes on the future. 

Explain that if he wants to try and apologise and rebuild your relationship and trust you’ll give him that opportunity when he is released – if you are still single.

My support pack Standing Up For Yourself will help you set out your expectations. 

NEXT IN TODAY’S DEAR DEIDRE I’m keen to try a threesome but my girlfriend won’t agree

READ DEIDRE’S PHOTO CASEBOOK Mia searches for a Christmas present for Charlie while he visits his lover

GET IN TOUCH How the page works and how to contact us

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You May Also Like

Alessandra Ambrosio protects herself against the Brazilian heat in a stylish sun hat and sarong

Alessandra Ambrosio looked stunning while she enjoyed a beach day in Brazil…

Ryan Gosling says he’s proud of his natural ‘Ken-ergy’ as he teases upcoming Barbie movie

Ryan Gosling has been creating quite a stir thanks to photos released…

Jon and Kate Gosselin’s daughter Mady, 21, wants ‘alone time’ in 2022 after dad claims he hasn’t seen her in eight years

JON and Kate Gosselin’s daughter Mady, 21, realized that she needed “alone…

Generation Gap: Game rules and how to watch

ABC is releasing a new game show called Generation Gap. Generation Gap…