DEAR DEIDRE: MY sister is so mean when it comes to buying birthday presents that it’s become a family joke.
Every year she gives me exactly the same thing: Cheap perfume from the bargain bin and a box of chewy toffees.
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I hate toffee, and cheap perfume gives me a migraine.
I’m 40 and she’s 42. I love her very much, but this is really starting to upset me.
I go out of my way to buy her something special and meaningful each year. This year, I bought her tickets to see her favourite band.
I don’t understand why she always reaches into her unwanted present supply for my gift.
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Why can’t she ask what I’d like?
If it’s the thought that counts, she must hate me. I know I’m being over-sensitive, but I actually feel like crying.
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DEIDRE SAYS: If you’ve never said anything, maybe she thinks you like her gifts.
You’ve got a few options.
You can say nothing, and this will continue. You could suggest giving to charity instead of exchanging gifts. Or you could suggest you both gift each other a day out together.
The other option is to be honest with her.
My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, should help you to speak your mind productively.
