DEAR DEIDRE: EVERY time my boyfriend and I try to have sex, we can’t. It’s like there’s something inside me blocking his way.
I’m 23, my boyfriend’s 26 and we’ve been together six months. We’ve never gone all the way.
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Everything’s fine when he uses his hands. But when we try to have sex, it’s like my vagina closes up.
I’ve been to the doctors, but they insist there’s nothing wrong.
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We’ve tried different positions, more foreplay and lubricants, but nothing’s worked.
I’m worried our relationship won’t last if we can’t get this sorted.
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DEIDRE SAYS: It sounds as though you may be suffering from vaginismus – when the vaginal muscles tighten on their own.
This tends to happen when you’re feeling nervous or anxious. The NHS website explains in more detail (nhs.uk/conditions/vaginismus).
There are a few things you can try. Some find counselling helps. Others have found relaxation techniques and pelvic floor exercises make a difference.
I’m also sending you my support pack on Painful Sex with some more useful tips.
